Reflections 2014
The
year started with a high. Working hard almost 10-12 hours daily, giving more
than 100% of my capability to the company which I worked for. The expectations
were obviously to excel and make a statement for myself that yes I can live up
to my expectations. Driving myself almost single handedly, learning from my
peers as to what needs to be done led to great learning. The process started as
soon as I entered this corporate world, a very confused student who didn’t know
how this IT industry works. First day in office and my manager told me that the
project was new and I have to learn by myself. Took me two years to really deep
dive into the core of my field. And when you dedicate that much, you do expect
from the company to live up to their promises. That didn’t happen. It’s true
that when you love what you do then only you can succeed. But at the end of the
day what matters is whether you are able to see yourself in the mirror and look
yourself in your eyes and observe the satisfaction, which wasn’t there. So I
decided to take a big risk.
Leaving
the job that too with a big Brand name is not easy for a person of my age and
then dealing with the typical mentality of the society. Lot of questions were
asked, lot of sarcastic comments were passed and I was considered a freak that
without a job in hand first, I decided to resign. But you know that what you
are doing is right and you can feel that something will absolutely turn up. The
biggest thing is being able to cope with the constant nagging of everyone around
you, did you find a job? or what’s going on? Or why don’t you try here and then
they recite almost all the big IT names that they have ever heard?, People here
consider themselves the master of everything, as if they have lived through
every hurdle that came across and emerged victorious. The big thing that they
never understand and acknowledge is, the person’s ability to come up strong
every time he/she fails. Giving interviews and not succeeding was like the iota
of problems that I was facing, it was the pressure of people expecting me to
succeed everywhere. Come on I was no Midas, not everything I touch will become
gold, and instead it became coal. There were some gems in my life that always
helped me grow through this torturous era (well it seemed like one) and I don’t
know in which way I can convey my deepest thanks to them. Coming back to the
point, my notice period ended and I was left with no job in hand, and I had to
go back to my hometown.
Hoping
to find peace there was a dream that never came true. Unless the people who
matter to you the most are with you, nothing else matters, believe me. I was
like a ping pong ball constantly being hit, spun and smashed. To quote a blog
“I
thought I could hear the buzz of millions, screaming out their instructions,
Sit down, stand up, stay,
This way, that way, go away
I can't breathe, I'm choking.”
In three months I spent almost a month in
trains. My brother who has always been my backbone was also moving away. It was
like everything that could go wrong went wrong. Still I never felt lost. And
then suddenly a conversation that was long overdue happened. A conversation
that every son dreads:
Father:
What
do you want to do in life? What is your goal?
Me:
I
don’t know papa. I am confused.
Father:
Listen
to me, do whatever you feel like doing, Study work anything, just remember I am
here with you with you, for you always!
I
don’t even have to give an explanation as to what these words could do to you.
I was filled with Fire!
Then
came August when I had a chance to interview with you guys. It went well and
obviously at first I was a little hesitant to start afresh with you. Those
small company jitters crept in. But everything that’s big must have been small
one day. Hence I decided to join and explore what is next. I found the basic
application interesting.
It
has been a short time but whatever time I have spent here I have enjoyed it.
Colleagues are very helpful and friendly. Obviously there are things that can
be made more employee friendly and I hope you must be working towards that. A
Client’s requirements are to be respected and to be dealt with utmost priority
but not at the cost of your employee’s satisfaction, that should be avoided. We
are your assets and it’s us who make your company’s identity. You can expect
100% productivity when we are at ease not when we are stressed. Else there is
an ample amount of knowledge that we gain here and that will always help us
grow professionally.
All
said and done, this year has been a roller coaster ride and there are no
complaints, just lessons learned. Looking forward to keep the roller coaster
going and keep learning. Looking forward for a great year and long relationship
ahead.
Commit
mistakes, fall down, stand up and try harder. That’s all that matters.
“Do
whatever you want to do”
Cheers
Kumud
Naugai